So much...

Crazy times, y'all.

This has been quite a week for experiences. Singlehandedly, I had the most life-changing, eye-opening two hour experience of my 23 years Wednesday evening. I had the pleasant opportunity to attend a seminar given by David Coleman, aka "the real life Dr. Hitch." For those of you who have seen the movie with Will Smith, you'll know who I'm talking about. The seminar focused not only on dating questions and issues, but also touched on relationships, both with your significant other and your friends. David Coleman talked about how true friends are never jealous of each other, and that they don't keep score in a friendship (like who does what and when). He also said that in a true friendship, there are never secrets between friends because honesty is always present.

I must admit I felt guilty and weird as he talked about friendship and knowing whether yours are true or not. Everything he was describing seemed to be the exact opposite of a situation I have with a friend currently. I was so confused at this point, so I stayed after to talk to him. I asked him what one can do in a situation like mine, because I'm having trouble deciding what the best course of action is. His words? "As long as you have feelings for someone, you can never be his or her friend." All of my other friends have been saying pretty much the same for a while. I don't discount anything that my friends tell me as advice, I know they all have good reason in saying what they do. But for someone who doesn't know me or the situation behind the question I asked, his simple advice was overwhelmingly right. As long as there are feelings present, you can't be friends with the person that you have them about, for they always run the risk of disrupting the friendship. (And furthermore, ruining it.) As for people needing others to be their friends; it's not a matter of needing them to be your friends, it's always a matter of wanting them in your life as your friends. Needing someone in your life is equal to making them an object, instead of a person.

And then my thoughts have been further confirmed by the past few days. It makes me realize that it's time to stand up and take charge or be prepared to be walked on again and again. (The idea of which I'm not too fond of.) I'm kinda glad that I'm going home for the summer, at least I won't have to deal with this crap on a daily basis anymore...

I'm just not going to make the effort...it's not worth the time or pain. If you want me, you know how to reach me.